Whisper
by LadyNyoko
Summary: Kaiba secretly loves Jonouchi, and finally works up the courage to tell the blonde. Only to have him die in his arms. Song fic to "Whisper" by Evanescence and in Seto's POV. Side fic to "Tourniquet."


**Title:** Whisper  
**Rating:** R  
**Genre:** Romance/Angst  
**Pairings:** Kaiba/Jonouchi  
**Warnings:** Character Suicide, mentionings of child abuse, hints of rape, lots of blood.  
**Summary:** Kaiba secretly loves Jonouchi, and finally works up the courage to tell the blonde. Only to have him die in his arms. Song fic to "Whisper" by Evanescence and in Seto's POV. Side fic to "Tourniquet."  
  
**A Few Helpful Hints:**   
*_Song Lyrics_*  
"Speaking out loud"  
'_A person's thoughts_'  
  
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-  
  
**Whisper**  
  
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-  
  
  


*_Catch me as I fall  
Say you're hear and it's all over now_*

I guess when you think about it, I've always had someone to catch me if I fell. Back then, in the orphanage, it was always Nyoko. She'd watch my back, and stand up for me. It wasn't that I was weak, but most of my time was spent standing up for Mokuba. During the time Gozaburo was alive, Mokuba would always catch me if I fell. I don't think I would've survived if he hadn't been there for me.

No, I take that back, I **couldn't** have survived.

Not through all the beatings, and... No, I can't think of that now.

But, I guess now that Mokuba's made friends with Yugi and his friends, I can't count on him anymore. But now, someone else is there to catch me, even though he doesn't know it. I only wish that one day he'd be there for me, and all of our fights will be over. Of course, how could Katsuya Jonouchi ever love Seto Kaiba, his tormentor?

*_Speaking to the atmosphere  
No one's here and I fall into myself_*

What would they say now, everyone who's ever stood by me, if they saw me the way I am now? So lonely that I've made a habit out of talking to myself? In a way, I wish that I had my own Yami. I could escape into the depths of myself to talk to my darker half. I don't care who they stick me with, as long as I have someone to talk to. There isn't anyone who could truely speak from their heart around a teenager who could have them fired in the blink of an eye if he saw fit.

*_This truth drives me into madness  
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away_*

What hurts the most is that it's the truth, and it's driving me insane. I wish I was wrong! I wish there was someone out there who would speak their heart around me!

But it'll be alright. As long as I can see Katsuya, I can will all of the pain away from me. As long as he's here, then I'll be able to cope with all my problems. I only wish I could tell him how I feel. I would but in reality, I'm afraid. I'm afraid he'll laugh, or reject me. I know that if I ask someone for advice, they'll just tell me to work up the guts to tell him. But it isn't that easy, I'd know. Countless times I've found myself in front of the blonde's front door, swearing to myself that today was the day I'd tell him.

And countless times I've run away...

*_Don't turn away  
Don't give into the pain  
Don't try to hide  
Though they're screaming your name  
Don't close your eyes  
God knows what lies behind them  
Don't turn out the light  
Never sleep never die_*

I guess I never thought about what might happen if I did tell him and he took it the right way. I was always looking on the dark side of things, like Gozaburo trained me to. I used to be an optimist, until he trained me.

God, I have to be strong, I can't cry.

*_I'm frightened by what I see  
But somehow I know that there's much more to come_*

I don't think I've ever been so scared in my life, not of anyone else. Gozaburo was the only person I ever truly feared, and I had good reason to. He gave me 'lessons' to teach me proper behavior, and he made sure he got the point across. The worst thing was that I knew there was so much more he was planning for me, and he told me that flat out.

I'm not the least bit grieved over his death.

*_Immobilized by my fear  
And soon to be blinded by tears_*

Somehow, I find myself in front of the door that has mocked me for so long. The door to the blonde's home. This time, I'm ready to tell him. This time, I'm going to tell Katsuya the truth.

Tentatively, I raised my hand to knock on the door. No answer.

Hesitantly, I test the knob and discover the door's unlocked. I'm sure no one will mind if I let myself in.

*_I can stop the pain if I will it all away_*

Immidiately, my senses are bombarded with the strong scent of alcohol, and I'm pretty sure that other scent is dried blood. I almost gagged on the smell alone, but the sight of the apartment was horrible. Broken glass, beer bottles and cans, and red stains. I felt like I had walked straight into hell itself.

"Excuse me, is Jonouchi here?" I asked carefully, making my way towards the sound of a television set.

"Are ya lookin' fer me or the useless piece o' shit?"

I swear I'll never forget that man. He had to be Katsuya's father, though he didn't look like a very good father.

"I'm looking for Katsuya, I'm a classmate of his," I replied lightly, trying to keep my normal cold demeanor up.

"Upstairs in `is fuckin' room."

*_Don't turn away  
Don't give into the pain  
Don't try to hide  
Though they're screaming your name  
Don't close your eyes  
God knows what lies behind them  
Don't turn out the light  
Never sleep never die_*

I couldn't supress a shudder as I made my way up the stairs, and when I opened the door to Katsuya's room, I practically screamed. He was lying their, his wrists slit wide open, drenched in his own blood. He was coughing and his eyes were barely open.

"Katsuya!"

*_Fallen angels at my feet  
Whispered voices at my ear_*

I ran to Jonouchi, not caring anymore that I was sobbing hysterically. I cried over him, whispering soothingly to him, trying to stop his wounds from bleeding. I could've sworn I heard him whisper something about his guardian angel. Oh gods, I don't care anymore, just don't let Jonouchi die!

*_Death before my eyes  
Lying next to me I fear_*

I ran out of that apartment, Katsuya in my arms and the devil at my heels. I had to get him to a hospital. He couldn't die, not now. I don't know, but I think I made record time to the nearest medical center. Almost instantly Katsuya was taken from my arms, rushed off to get his wounds fixed, and I just sat there, sobbing my heart out. Was I the reason my love had slit his own wrists?

*_She beckons me shall I give in  
Upon my end shall I begin_*

And then they let me in. He wasn't going to make it. I stood over him, stroking his cheek, and watching my tears fall onto his face. He was so pale, so different from the glowing boy I saw every day. I watched as he hazily opened his eyes, and looked right at me. He took a deep breath, and then the drone of the heart monitor filled the room. Katsuya Jonouchi, the only one I could ever truly love, had died in my arms. Maybe his spirit will still hear my last message before I reached the brink of insanity...

"I love you, Katsuya Jonouchi. I always have, and I always will..."

*_Forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end_*

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

*sobbing hysterically* Another one I cried while writing! I did this as a request, because a reviewer wanted to see Seto's side to the story! I regret actually doing this! It's so sad! But on the bright side, you guys have a sequal to look forward to!

*sniffle*

Please let me know what you think!


End file.
